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Broken Dreams, Business & Creativity

I realized that I have carried a lot of grief around because I let go of something I loved that I didn't want to let go of, songwriting, but I also learned some important lessons on my journey.

I stopped songwriting because I was told that we couldn’t afford for me to do it anymore. I felt ashamed that it was a drain on our finances. But I resented giving it up, although I couldn’t admit it to myself at the time. I sold all my equipment. And embarked on a new dream. And it was fun and rewarding.

But in the back of my mind I held to a fantasy of having a business that ran on it’s own 24/7 and “someday” I would be able to get back to songwriting.

Then I heard Armand Morin talk about how you should do what you love ( that crazy dream) on the weekends and not give it up. But by that time several years had passed, and I told myself I didn’t have time and, besides, too much time had passed, and I’m ashamed to say, I told myself I was too old anyway.

And then, eventually, I realized how much I missed it and I started to write again, and it was hard, I was rusty and to be perfectly honest. My writing sucked. And I stopped again.

And I was mad at myself for letting so much time go by and listening to other people and giving up on my dream.

And the sadness lived on.

But, if there is one thing I have gained from being online for the last 15 years, is that persistence and staying in the game is where it is at.

Never stop and never give up. Don’t listen to other people. Find a way.

I know from experience it’s a lot easier to persist when you are getting paid and rewarded for your efforts. But I also know the pain of letting go of a dream you were not ready or wanting to let go of. It can eat at your soul.

I have also learned how one “yes” or one “no” can change and the course of your life.

The winner of American Idol was a contestant last year and didn’t get into the top 20. This year he came back only to accompany a friend who was auditioning. The judges were happy to see him and asked him to audition again. He hesitated, but then agreed to do it. That one yes changed his life forever.

I look back on my life so far and I see how the no’s and the yes’s have changed the course of my life. I am still learning how to say no to the things that don’t support me and yes to the things that do. And coming to terms with times I should have said yes to and said no instead. It is an ongoing process at each stage of a business and life.

Now, I honestly don’t know if I can ever find my writing voice again. But I cannot live with that sadness any more, so I have some decisions to make. I can’t get those 15 years of weekends back, but I can see where the road takes me from here. And I know that persistence and saying yes to myself is key.

Don’t get me wrong. I love what I do in my “real” business or I would not still be doing it. But....that other dream...

So a word from the wise: I know that anything you want is out there. You just have to persist, make the time and say yes.

Follow your dream and don’t let anyone convince you to give it up whatever it is. EVER!

It has to be YOUR choice, and only your choice whatever path you choose for however long you choose it.

If I inspire anyone with this, please let me know by going to my Facebook post at: https://www.facebook.com/ellenviolette/posts/10157299386962774

Call it a birthday gift to me????You can also read more of the inspiring comments there.

That is all??




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